Well, I have not written for a while, mainly because I have known for about 2 months that I am pregnant (due Jauary 2011) and that is all I wanted to write about but I felt it was too soon to talk about it, and maybe listening to old wives tales you shouldn't tell until after 3 months, so, now I am 15 weeks pregnant and have had a scan which showed that everthing is OK with baby I feel I can talk abut it. Also I have been back in England and busy doing lots of things including looking for a job, catching up with family and friends and Stu came to visit then I went to visit his family in Margate too.
This news has had a huge effect on me, as you might guess, I have been worried, scared and excited but mainly I have felt happy. I know it is a huge, HUGE, lifechanging thing and I know it will be difficult at times (over the next 18 or more years!!!) but it is the most amazing thing I have ever experienced and the greatest feeling, knowing I will be a mammy! I am not sure about many things but I have always wanted chilren and this is a crazy and emotional time which I really want to enjoy as much as possible. The scan made it all so real, me and Stu were sat there looking at our baby, it was jumping around and looked so perfect, I was laughing so much as I just couldn't believe it, that the little person on the screen was inside of me, it is a strange feeling, I cant wait to feel it move so it is even more real.
I started this blog to remind myelf that I have happy things in my life, at a time when I was overwhelmed by sad thoughts and bad experiences and felt a bit lost and very alone. I realised pretty soon that I am NOT alone, I have an amazing family who are so good to me and so supportive of all I do. And I have great friends who I can talk to about everything and make me laugh so much. I feel now even more lucky for having these people in my life so they can now share in my new happiness and also help me out!!!! Now maybe my blog should change as I am not at risk of needing to forget anything, in fact now I want to remember eerything in more detail,record my new journey, we will see, maybe nobody will want to read the blog of nappies and crying! (though my emotions are supposed to be all over the place I haven't cried too much more than usual.... more than most people still though!!!)
Last week I met Stuart's family and they are really nice too, extra lucky there as could have been a bit weird, the first time they meet their sons new girlfriend she is already 3 and a bit months preggers! But I should have known that Stu was such a nice an genuine person because of his family. Stu has been great, maybe more worried abut some things than me (like money) and less interested in some thngs (like baby shoes) and a bit cringy when I talk about tearing and stitches..... hahaha!
He met my family too and it all went really well, he even managed to understand Geordie a few times, he will learn soon enough!
Yes, another blog where as I write I realise that while I am no millionaire, some things are much more important like people you love and who love you and in that I am rich!
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